set the dials back to zero.

i keep finding myself on the eastern side of things. not on earth, but on segments and in time.
just arrived into east london from east africa. 2 weeks in kenya,tanzania, and zanzibar. i can't quite get a handle on anything at the moment. i'm officially in chapter 10. i think it will all start making sense very soon. watching the animals this time was different. we were the caged animals. the endagered species in strange familial vehicles. how beautiful is this planet that we live on. we can't forget. it is not over. i rode on a hot air balloon at 5 in the morning watching the sunrise over the serengeti in tanzania. i could feel it all. a group of zebras will send you into a siezure if you aren't careful. the stripes and the zing zang. zanzibar waters are warm and clear. the sand is bright. i felt torn out when i left the waters. it was too good. i am still in the present. but each day i think about it all. i feel good. i know it will all work out. my dials are at zero.

at a flat on my own. which is nice. i have my things and a place to rest my head. jerome has left and i'm going to sit in on the norman j show with chelsea. looking forward to hearing the music they play.

and about the record. because thats what i was set out to do. i start working on it wednesday with marcus doing some singing maybe. i have had a hard time deciding what is best. will be back in bergen on sunday to record. all vocals on same mics. i think that is the best. the thread that holds it together. the mics. will it be nice with a guys voice doing harmonies? or should i do them myself? questions questions.

i know if i talk about it with anyone, i will end up at my own conclusion so i know i must decide on my own. on my own. on my own. i am hungry.

also i know that whatever emotions i am going through, even if i am hurt or rejected, even if i am elated and satiated, even if i am on top of the world, even if i am on the deep end, they are supposed to be there and were handed to me. i have provided these emotions in others and cyclically, they are handed to me. sometimes i just don't know where to put them, where to hold them. how much of it is real and how much of it is from travelling. it becomes fairy tale. one long tale. and then i am home (without a key) , with my feet on the ground, and still wondering. was it all a mistake? do i say too much? i just can't help it.